Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Appliance Denyance

I started out this fine morning with the single most illogical, gnarled, 35-38 year old in all of Oklahoma City. This man is the anti-David Filipek. Let's call him Devil Filipek. He is the source of what is easily my best/worst time here.

Ray needs a washer and dryer. He called a 'gentleman' last night around 9pm to inquire about the pair he had for sale at around $90 (too cheap, i should've know better).

They agreed to meet this morning at 7:30. Ray was 10 minutes late (of course), but he did call at 7:25 to let Devil know. Devil said that he had to leave by 8. No problem. Ray arrives and proceeds to knock on the wrong door. Ray calls Devil and finds out the correct address. It's one house over. Ray knocks on the correct door. No answer. He walks back to the driveway and there's Devil. Ray laughed and said, "Hey, are you Devil?"

Do you know when a mean animal pauses that awkward staring pause just before the snarl and gutteral warning? Ray knew they were about to share a moment that he would remember forever. "This ain't funny, " he snapped. "You are laughing, trying to be nice, but this ain't funny." "I sincerely apologize," Ray said sincerely. "You were supposed to be here at 7:30 is that your car?" "Yes," Ray replied. He pointed to the side of his house and spouted "There's the washer and dryer, do you want them?" in a tone as if Ray had just peed on the rug over the spot where Devil just killed and buried his betrothed postman. Ray quickly, "I'm really sorry that.." Devil, "There's the washer and dryer. DO YOU want them!?" Ray wanted desperately to try and go through with the transaction just to see what would happen but what if the washer and dryer were as faulty as their coversation? What if THAT was where the postman was buried? Why isn't somebody filming this? Ray, sincerely, "No, I do not." Ray smiled at his use of a non-contraction, turned, and walked toward the car to these words "THEN GET OFF MY FUCKING PROPERTY AND COMB YOUR FUCKING HAIR!"

Like brats in elevators, these were all of my buttons being pushed at once. I kept walking.

I, sincerely, just left this message on his answering machine, "This is Ray, I just wanted to apologize if I made you late for work this morning. I wish you luck in selling your washer and dryer." Like brats in elevators.

I'm pretty sure I found the ad in the "Daily Oklahoman". Something like and $90/2 = $45. I'm just sayin.


Blogger oakleyses said...

louis vuitton handbags, coach outlet, tory burch outlet online, burberry outlet online, chanel handbags, louis vuitton, nike free, prada handbags, coach outlet, nike air max, nike air max, longchamp outlet online, ray ban sunglasses, michael kors outlet store, true religion, michael kors outlet online, oakley vault, christian louboutin, kate spade outlet online, prada outlet, burberry outlet online, nike outlet, michael kors handbags, louis vuitton outlet, oakley sunglasses, michael kors outlet online, gucci handbags, coach outlet store online, louis vuitton outlet online, kate spade outlet, longchamp handbags, tiffany and co jewelry, polo ralph lauren outlet, red bottom shoes, jordan shoes, polo ralph lauren, tiffany jewelry, michael kors outlet online, true religion outlet, coach purses, christian louboutin outlet, ray ban outlet, christian louboutin shoes, michael kors outlet, louis vuitton outlet, cheap oakley sunglasses, longchamp outlet

8:37 PM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

michael kors canada, abercrombie and fitch, guess pas cher, nike air max, sac louis vuitton, longchamp pas cher, north face, air max pas cher, burberry pas cher, nike air max, chaussure louboutin, ray ban uk, scarpe hogan, barbour, nike air force, nike roshe run, oakley pas cher, louis vuitton, mulberry, new balance pas cher, air max, converse pas cher, nike free, tn pas cher, ralph lauren pas cher, sac michael kors, longchamp, nike free pas cher, nike roshe, hollister, lululemon, louis vuitton pas cher, true religion outlet, ralph lauren, true religion jeans, vans pas cher, louis vuitton uk, air jordan, hollister, nike blazer pas cher, michael kors uk, timberland, lacoste pas cher, hermes pas cher, ray ban pas cher, north face pas cher, sac vanessa bruno

8:41 PM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

north face jackets, soccer shoes, ugg, reebok shoes, canada goose outlet, birkin bag, north face outlet, abercrombie and fitch, wedding dresses, insanity workout, ugg outlet, babyliss pro, nfl jerseys, ugg soldes, ugg boots, p90x workout, nike trainers, chi flat iron, asics shoes, lululemon outlet, longchamp, ghd, nike huarache, canada goose, mont blanc pens, new balance outlet, mcm handbags, marc jacobs outlet, jimmy choo shoes, bottega veneta, instyler ionic styler, uggs outlet, herve leger, beats headphones, nike roshe, replica watches, soccer jerseys, vans outlet, ferragamo shoes, hollister, uggs outlet, valentino shoes, ugg boots, canada goose outlet, mac cosmetics, canada goose outlet, giuseppe zanotti, uggs on sale, celine handbags

8:52 PM  
Blogger oakleyses said...

ralph lauren, nike air max, moncler outlet, replica watches, hollister clothing, montre femme, moncler outlet, toms outlet, canada goose, wedding dress, karen millen, swarovski uk, coach outlet, louboutin, pandora uk, canada goose pas cher, links of london uk, moncler, air max, juicy couture outlet, pandora charms, supra shoes, juicy couture outlet, converse shoes, hollister canada, timberland shoes, pandora jewelry, moncler, thomas sabo uk, moncler, baseball bats, lancel, moncler, ugg, converse, iphone 6 case, oakley, vans, swarovski jewelry, canada goose, uggs canada, ray ban, parajumpers outlet, canada goose, gucci, moncler, louis vuitton canada, hollister

8:57 PM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home